DEAR ABBY: My cousin ƵScottyƵ invited my husband and me to see his new house. He made it clear, several times, that my sister and her husband, ƵIan,Ƶ are not invited because his wife doesnƵt like Ian. My sister and brother-in-law would have no problem if they never saw Scotty again. However, every time I speak to Scotty, he reiterates not to bring my brother-in-law along.
I admit, Ian is a difficult guy to get to know, but I have known him for 40 years and he really has a heart of gold. How can I resolve this in a way that wonƵt result in not communicating with Scotty ever again? Ƶ RELATIVE DRAMA IN FLORIDA
DEAR RELATIVE DRAMA: The next time Scotty starts on his rant about Ian, head him off by interrupting him and saying, ƵYou have already told me that. You donƵt need to repeat it.Ƶ Then change the subject.
DEAR ABBY: My dear husband died suddenly last year. ItƵs been difficult, but I am blessed to have good friends and close family. The hardest part, however, has been the four-plus months it took to decipher his online accounts. He left me few passwords, and many of his contacts were uncooperative. Why should it be impossible to pay someone elseƵs bill? I cannot stress enough how important it is to have a log or written account of passwords and usernames. Ƶ LESSON LEARNED IN MICHIGAN
DEAR LESSON LEARNED: Please accept my sympathy for the loss of your husband. You are not the only spouse who has written about this very real problem. Sometimes the concept of a world without us in it can be difficult to comprehend, hence the hesitancy to share passwords. But death can come at any time. Readers, it can spare your loved ones a world of unneeded stress to log those passwords and make sure your spouse, trustee or attorney can access them in case of emergency.
DEAR ABBY: When my wife of nine months makes a dental or medical appointment, she gives her last name as her late husbandƵs last name. He died 10 years ago. Should I be disappointed with my bride since, before we were married, she said she would adopt my last name? Ƶ NEWLYWED IN FLORIDA
DEAR NEWLYWED: Why your bride would be hesitant to do this, I canƵt guess, but because it bothers you, discuss it with her before it festers. Informing health care professionals about a name change is fairly simple. All one has to do is inform the receptionist that a new name should be entered into the computer.
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